Wednesday, April 29, 2009

Sonnet of Jana

I saw you sitting in the lover’s pew
Your twice double heart in its glassy cage
Eyes filled with longing, eyes filled with much rue
We the audience eyes set on the stage
Your gaze it wanders, searches their faces
Looking for a sign of some changing love
We see the potential in such strange places
The pew of lovers, a sign from above
But no, you are blind to that before you
You have no idea what we see right now
If you were to see what would you then do
If your eyes opened, to love, would you bow?
As long as longing blackens your vision
Love has not a hope, neither does reason

Tuesday, April 28, 2009

Breathing Again

Falling, so fast and far and deeper into the chasm
The cold, wet walls passing so fast and far and deeper
But what will you do when the water comes rushing up
Icy fingers reaching to kill your burning heart?

As the waters rush about and grope in the dark
As the million mutes screaming without a sound
Can your frozen hands and feet swim in this world?
Or will your surface become your seafloor?

Trapped in the atmosphere so thin and harsh
Where words and sounds echo in empty memory
Struggling in silk threads around your heart and lungs
While the bitter worn eats at your Muse’s hands

As the walls grow closer, the wind blows stronger
Water everywhere, emptiness tugging at weary lungs
How can anyone breathe in this breathless world?
Do you dare to take off this cold, metal respirator?

Do you dare to breathe the cool, evening air again?
Letting the pain of fresh air burn within you
And the beating of your heart remind you that you are still alive
That you can AND WILL survive

Let it go, let it go, let it go
Let it fall, and break upon the floor
May you breathe the untouched air again
Unfiltered, unashamed, unchanged, untouchable

Beating, breathing, living, loving
Building, basking, lasting, learning

Monday, April 27, 2009

WoL: Part 5 - The Memories

Waves of Love
Part 5:
The Memories

The far off waves crashed upon the silver sands, as the pale moon illuminated the lonely beach. Three figures sat around the blazing fire, orange and yellow tongues licking and crackling as sweet pine smoke wafted up through the warm wind of the night. The stars were out to dance above them as the older boy took out his panpipes and began to play a rondo-song. The first girl stood up, small cymbals in each hand that she clacked together, as she danced around the fire.

The other girl, with her long, gold-blushed brown curls stood as well and began to dance with the first girl, her sweet voice intoning with the notes of the panpipe. They laughed and danced around the fire, the pace quickening, the notes coming faster, until they stopped and collapsed on the soft sand, out of breath and laughing. Lia sat back up and sighed as she looked over her two best friends, smiling.

*~*~*~*~*~*

She was standing on her balcony, watching the stars. Lia could hardly believe that they were the same stars as that night on the beach so long ago. Part of her wished that she could go back there, to that time, to that place when life was simpler and purer and full of childhood’s hope and innocence. She sighed, watching the last trace of the sunset dip into the ocean’s folds, and disappear.

“Excuse me, miss.” said a servant girl behind her, timid and with fear. “Dinner will be ready in an hour, if it pleases you.”

“What? Oh, alright. I should be getting ready.” She said with cool composure as she walked past the servant girl. “Have a bath drawn for me, and some fresh robes fetched. I need to look perfect tonight.”

“As you wish.” She said bowing and running out the door quickly.

A few hours later found Lia soaking in a milk bath, rose and lotus petals bobbing on the surface of the large, marble tub. A servant girl was rinsing her hair with rose water, while another was displaying the various dresses for her approval.

“Let me see the yellow one again.” She said as the girl quickly held up a pale yellow dress with small white pearls embroidered on it. “Hmm. And the violet one with the diamonds?”

The girl shuffled through the clothing, her hands trembling, as she tried to find the requested dress. Her trembling hands looked through the pile, and finally got a hold of it. But just then, she stepped forward and slipped on the smooth stone, all the dresses falling on the wet floor.

“You idiot! Look what you’ve done! I told you, tonight has to be perfect! Get out! All of you! Leave me alone!” Lia snapped as she pushed the girls attending her away.

The three hustled out of the bathing room and down the corridor to take the dresses back to the laundry. They stepped inside, the scent of lavender cascading over them. The one who slipped threw the wet dresses in a pile and sat on them, fist clenched as she spoke.

“That… that… that siren! How dare she treat us like this!”

The hair washer was fixing her own hair in the mirror as she commented dryly, “You’d think an honored guest such as her would have enough manners not to insult her hosts like that.”

“Ha! That thing? Have manners?” cackled the third, “Remember, it’s not a human. It’s an animal. The way it’s mistreating the Archduke’s hospitality shows that it’s nothing more than a spoiled, selfish little pet, thinking it can have whatever it wants.”

“And the way she wanted everything to be perfect for tonight! I mean, sure she’s the honored guest but its not like she’s there to impress any of them!” the first said with a swager of her wide hips.

“You girls must not judge my guest too harshly.” spoke an old voice from the shadows behind them.

“Archduke!” all three cried in surprise, prostrating themselves before the man.

“There’s no need to apologize. I understand that you are frustrated by Sealia. But please, don’t pass judgement on that which you do not understand. She has a very complicated past, and I am partly to blame for it.” Here he sat down on a small wooden stool and motioned for the three to rise. “Come, sit and listen.”

*~*~*~*~*~*

It was a glorious summer to be young. Regeus had been sent ahead of the main party to prepare the villa for his family’s coming. It would be one of the many firsts for him that summer, as he began taking on more and more of the responsibilities that would come when he was declared Duke. But for right now, he was just Regeus.

The first day at the villa he inspected everything to make sure that all was still well. The villa which sat upon a high, white, granite cliff overlooking the beautiful blue bay was a white staccato building with red tile roof and a wide open courtyard. Regeus had made all the arrangements for servants, food, and entertainment to be ready when his father arrived.

He walked through the warm house and out the back to where the fresh, cool ocean breezes caught his dark, auburn hair and swayed it across his pale skin. Blue eyes met the same blue tinted ocean as he made his way down the cliffs to go swimming. He did not see her that day, but she saw him.

The next day, his family arrived early, with his younger cousin, Persephone, in tow. She was a spirited girl of 15, with long, Grecian black curls, and a golden hued skin from frequent ocean swimming. Her dark eyes flashed with passion whenever she spoke, and back home in Syracuse, she had many admirers continually training behind her. It was for a mishap with one, that her parents had sent her to the villa that summer, while they found a husband for her, before she caused the family any more embarrassment.

“Regeus! By Demeter, I’ve missed you!” she squealed as she ran and embraced him.

“Hahaha! Persephone. A whole year has been much too long.” He said as he tried prying himself from her embrace. “How’s Syracuse?”

“Oh, the same as ever. You know, being a Duke’s daughter can be so boring some times. But, I’ve taken dancing lessons from the Priestesses of Aphrodite to keep busy. I’ll show you some of my new dances while I’m here!” She cried with ecstasy before running of to find the way down to the beach.

“Oh, Persephone, you never change.” Regeus said quietly as he chuckled.

*~*~*~*~*~*

“Regeus! How are you!” Persephone cried as she threw herself on her cousin.

“Persephone. You really don’t change, do you.” He commented smiling dryly. “Welcome to Alexandria.”

“My, aren’t we formal.” She giggled as she bowed to him, “Why, thank you, your Dukiness. Now, where is she!?!”

“Seph…” he began.

“I know, I know, you probably wanted to surprise me but I couldn’t help it. The young groomsman who helped take care of my horse was so friendly and talkative that he told me everything.” She smiled bouncing up and down.

“You know, I don’t think your husband would appreciate you flirting with all these men.” Regeus said sternly, trying to change the topic.

“Who? Tiberius? Please, he’s so old he wouldn’t care. But enough about me! Tell me! Tell me! Tell me!” Persephone cried handing her cape to a servant, “Where is Lia? I’ve missed her so much!”

“How do you know Lia?” asked a man who had suddenly appeared behind her, dressed in cerulean robes lined with white fur.

“Persephone, this is Orpheus. Orpheus, my cousin Persephone.” Regeus said sighing.

“Milady Persephone, delighted to meet you.” He said stepping forward and kissing her hand. “Now, you were about to say?”

“Orpheus, that’s enough.” Regeus said stepping between the two of them, taking Orpheus’ hand off of hers. “You won’t be using any of your powers on her. She’s protected by my crest anyway. And besides, you’ll find that you really wouldn’t even need them.”

“Hey! Was the an insult!” Persephone called.

“Not at all. Trust me, you don’t want to hear the story, Orpheus.” said Regeus walking towards the main banquet hall. “But if you must, I will remove myself to check on the dining room.”

“What’s wrong with him?” asked Orpheus, sipping from a cup that had materialized in his hand.

“It’s complicated.” Persephone said, then smiling answered, “It all happened two summers ago…”

*~*~*~*~*~*

After the first few days of getting settled in, the adults had more or less retired to the main house and the gardens, while Persephone and Regeus went swimming everyday. That’s how they met her. Sealia was a spirited young girl, skin barely kissed by the sun, and long brown hair that had a hint of gold running through it.

They were running across the beach when they saw her by the tide pools. She was squatting beside one, hand tracing designs on the water. Regeus had felt his heart skip a beat, thinking she must be a mermaid or a oceanid. But she didn’t disappear in the water when Persephone called to her. Instead, she stood and waved back.

So started the best summer of their lives. Each morning the three friends would meet at the tidepools, catching sea stars and watching for dolphins. Then they would retreat to the house at midday, to play in the long rows of the vineyards, running between them, feasting on the rich, sweet grapes.

When harvet time came they all three trampled the grapes together in the large vat. At night, they made their way to the beach, where a fire was lit, and stories and songs told. Persephone began teaching Lia her dances, and soon they were dancing around the fire to the festive melodies that Regeus played.

*~*~*~*~*~*

“But didn’t they know she was a siren?” asked the youngest servant girl.

“No, she told them she was the daughter of a senator whose villa was down the shore from ours.” The Archduke replied.

“So, what happened? I mean, she sounds nice and all, but now she’s so harsh and bitter.” said the hairwasher as she combed her hair.

“Well, there was a celebration held one evening, it was Regeus’ birthday…”

*~*~*~*~*~*

“Happy birthday Regeus!” called Persephone as she hugged him and gave him a wrapped present. “I brought this all the way from Syracuse. You have no idea how much I wanted to give it to you before now!”

He unwrapped the present to find a pair of white ivory panpipes. He blew experimentally across the line of holes, a hollow, breathy note escaping. Regeus smiled and played a few bars of a song and the musicians quickly picked it up. As he and Persephone walked through the crowded room, they talked.

“So, where is Lia?” he asked scanning the crowd with expectation.

“She said something about having a present for you.” Persephone said as they walked to the end of the room and out on the terrace.

“Hmmm. I wonder what it is…” he said smiling to himself.

“You like her, don’t you!” Persephone cried with joy. “I knew it! From the moment I saw her I knew you’d like her!”

“Well, she is very pretty. And I enjoy spening time with her.” Regeus said grinning devilishly.

“So you do love her!” Persephone yelled, skipping in place. “I was right! Hahaha! I knew it!”

“I guess I do.” Regeus said to himself as he looked over the evening sky smiling broadly.

*~*~*~*~*~*

“Wait. You say this was two summers ago? On midsummer’s eve?” Orpheus asked, his normal carefree demeanor suddenly grave, “Are you sure?”

“Yes.” Persephone said, “Now shush! I’m getting to the good part!”

*~*~*~*~*~*

As the night wore on, Regeus grew more and more excited to see Lia. It was near the ninth hour before she finally arrived. And when she did, Regeus knew it had been worth the wait. She was dressed in a cream colored dress that accented her slightly tan skin beautifully, while her hair seemed to be more golden than usual as it fell across her shoulders and back. There was something about her. Something mystical and magical which caused all heads to turn.

Lia had never been so embarrassed in her life. Sure, she had been in front of crowds before, but never had all talking stopped and every eyes focused on her like this. Her cheeks flushed a bit, and she felt a feathery quiver run through her body. Regeus was there, at the other end of the room. His smile lit up the room for her, and his eyes became her everything. She walked towards him, her thoughts of everyone else forgotten.

“Lia, you look beautiful.” he said barely above a whisper, as the room returned to normal.

“Thank you.” She spoke softly and with cheeks blushing. “I’m glad you like it.”

“Come on, I want you to meet my father. He’s the Archduke of Alexandria.” Regeus said as he ushered her towards the table where the older gentleman sat.

He was the picture of Regeus, though with silvery lined hair and aged worn skin. Even as she approached him, Lia felt his mind, his very presence, brushing over her as if feeling what she truly was. In that instant every secret she had ever hidden was made bare before his probing presence. He smiled as he greeted her.

“Hail, Sealia. How goes the one who has captured my son’s heart?” he asked warmly.

“Your majesty. You are too kind.” Lia was doing her best to suppress the anxiety she felt meeting him. “Regeus has told me so much about you and your beautiful city. I hope to visit it someday.”

“And you shall. I’m sure of it.” He more stated than said, smiling.

They walked from there to the balcony, Lia breathing a sigh of relief after the brief, but intense, interaction. She looked over at Regeus and smiled deep within herself. He was everything she had ever dreamed of. He was handsome, funny, mature, and so considerate. He was perfect and she loved him. That’s why she did what she did. She sacrificed it all for him.

“That was so embarrassing.” She breathed, smiling softly.

“Don’t worry. You did great. He always does that when he meets someone new. Trust me, after that you’ll have no problem talking to him.” Regeus met her gaze and smiled back.

He played a song on his panpipes and Lia sang along, the first time he had ever heard her sing before. He was instantly enchanted by the sweet beauty of her voice. That night, beneath the starry vault of the universe, they pledged their eternal and undying love for one another. They were each other’s first loves and they were sure that nothing would ever tear them apart.

*~*~*~*~*~*

“What happened?” asked the three girls sitting around the Archduke on his stool.

“Well, there was a problem.” The old man said wearily.

“She was a siren.” One of the girls said.

“No, Lia had been a regular human girl. Just like you three.” And all three gasped with shock at his words.

*~*~*~*~*~*

“Persephone,” Orpheus said, “Wait, before you tell any further, I think I understand now. There is a part of the story you don’t know. Lia wasn’t always a siren. When I first met her she was a human being. It was that same night two summers ago, on midsummer’s eve.”

*~*~*~*~*~*

“Hello?” her voice echoed in the grotto as the blue light rippled across the stony ceiling.

“Yes, who is it?” asked a bored voice.

“A-are you Lord Orpheus? Please, my lord, I need your help.” she said kneeling on the ground.

“A human? How interesting? Yes, human? How can I help you?” asked the giant head that appeared out of the swirling blue waters.

“Please, I want you to… to turn me into a siren.” she said, bowing her head.

“Why?” Orpheus asked, bemused.

“Because, there is a man I love, and he doesn’t love me.” She said tersely, a tear on her cheek.

“How do you know that?” Orpheus replied.

“I can see it in his eyes. He sees me only as a friend. I need to be made into a beautiful siren so that he can fall in love with me too.” She said in a small voice.

“Well, let’s say I could change you into a siren. What would I get out of it?” asked the demigod.

“What ever you want. You can name the price.” Lia spoke fervently. “All I want is for my prince to love me.”

“Your prince, eh? Well, who am I to stifle true love. I will grant you your request. And in exchange, I will collect payment at a later date.”

*~*~*~*~*~*

“What?!” all three cried in unison.

“She became a siren for him?!”

“Why? Didn’t he already love her?!?”

“If you let me finish my tale all will be revealed in time.” The Archduke said. “My son. My son and I had an argument that night, once Lia was gone. I told him that his love for her was immature, physical, outward appearance based, and childish. He took my words very hard, but upon deeper reflection, he knew it to be true. He did not really love Lia as she loved him. Howeve, I had not forseen his reaction to this personal revelation…”

*~*~*~*~*~*

It was a clear and beautiful day as Regeus and Lia walked between the large rocks, the gentle, caressing waves, washing over and between the stones to where the two stood. Lia was beaming and beautiful, with a light blue dress with silver thread interwoven within it. Her blue eyes caught his and her love poured out towards him. She did not regret her deal with Orpheus.

They stood quietly for a few moments, unaware of how their lived were about to change.

“Lia, I’m sorry. I’m leaving tomorrow for Alexandria.” Regeus said, facing the sea, where a line of grey clouds could be seen on the horizon.

There was a long, awkward pause, as the shock settled in.

“When will you be back?” she asked softly, sadness in her voice almost concealed.

“I’m not sure. Nor for a while.” He said still not facing her.

“Why? Why are you leaving me? I thought we were happy…” she said, holding back a tear. “We promised, just last night, hearts as one forever.”

“I’m sorry Lia. I thought it was love… but it wasn’t.” his voice cracked as he said it, a sob held back. “I realize the error of my ways now. It was wrong of me to lead you astray like that. I-I must go.”

And so he ran across the beach back to the house. Lia sat there on that rock, the shock giving way to intense pain. She tried to keep it in, tried to control it, but she couldn’t. Her whole body shook as she sat there, crying as the raindrops started falling around her. She cried her heart out as the waves crashed around her, the rain soaked her, and her world fell apart. She had sacrificed everything for him. She had given up her life, her family, her humanity, for him. And now, now he was saying it was all for nothing.

All night long she lay there crying, and until the morning began to rise. She stood and faced the new day, resolute. Her pain had crumpled in upon itself, and become a hardened shell. She no longer felt the sadness, only the anger. The burning, bleeding, breaking anger of the deepest betrayal. She took to the skies and flew to the villa, but no one was there. Enraged, she tore the entire villa apart, till not a single stone was left upon another. Then she flew to the nearby ocean and perched upon a round stone. And from there she kept her watch day and night, sinking all ships who came close. Her rage became her only reality, her bitterness and anger her anchor to sanity. And that is what happened to sweet and lovely Sealia, whose heart was broken beyond repair, and is now Lia.”

*~*~*~*~*~*

“So that’s what happened to Lia.” said Orpheus. “If I had known the circumstances I would never have turned her into a siren.”

“I had no idea she had been so deeply hurt.” Persephone said, “That day, so long ago, I remember Regeus telling me we had to hurry and leave. We set sail and never went back to the villa, and he was never the same again. He became… colder. He smiles, but not the same smile. It’s a fake he wears and fools everyone else with. I saw it again today. In all this time, he hasn’t really smiled since.”

“And now the fates have brought them together again, it would seem.” Orpheus said, summoning another cup of wine for Persephone as well, “Come, lets get to the dining hall, it’s almost dinner time.”

*~*~*~*~*~*

Somewhere in the halls of the palace, Lia walked slowly, her satin, sky blue gown rustling along the floor. She found the laundry room and stepped inside. The three servants were there, but the Archduke was gone the second she stepped inside.

“I wanted to apologize to you three. I realize you were just trying to help. Honestly, it’s been a while since I’ve had to interact with people. But that’s no excuse. I’m really sorry for loosing my patience like that.”

All three mumble their acceptance and bowed, none making eye contact for fear that she would see the tears in their eyes. She left the laundry room and made her way down the candle lit hallway. Half way down it, she heard a voice echoing towards her. As she followed the sound, she began to hear the words of the song:

“Why are your eyes, so lonely tonight?
Why is your laughter not here?
When all becomes dark, can I be your light?
Close beside me, there’s nothing to fear.
You are precious, beloved
Like a pearl in the sea
I love you with my whole heart
But will you ever, love me?
With your heart, trust me.”

Lia stepped into a side chamber where Tycus was sitting. He was strumming his lyre, and looked up just as she entered. He smiled, his dark eyes meeting her blues, locking them, searching them for an answer. She felt the light from his smile, begin to touch beneath her shell. It was scary and exhilarating all at once. She sat down beside him, and he leaned forward.

“Sealia, I love you. I loved you since the moment I heard your siren’s song, calling my heart.” he whispered.

“I love you too, Tycus.” She beamed, the words like balm to her soul.

In the shadow of the passage, where neither of them could see, the candle light gleamed faintly off of an ivory panpipe strung around someone’s neck. He was holding his breathe as he heard her response. He forced himself to breath. This was for the better. Tycus could lover her and take care of her like he never could. She would be happier this way. At least that’s what he tried to tell himself.

Sunday, April 26, 2009

Ode to the Quiet Old Evening

Here's another poem I wrote just tonight as I was between essays for my classes. Sorry that i haven't had enough time recently to finish part 5. Its coming, don't worry. I am actually going to be writng most of it tomorrow in one of my classes so hoepfully it will be done by tomorrow night. Again, sorry about the delay. You guys rock!

*****************************
Ode to the Quiet Old Evening

The cars are silent, vacant shells of motion
The stars are late coming, and the world is old
The concrete, cracked and raked with industry
Wheezes under the pressure of ten million feet
Forty million rubber tires, sitting in lines of red lights
There is no movement, no humans, only automans within
All is silent, stale air neither cold nor warm nor tantalizing
The ground is too hard, we dare not step upon it
The world is older, greyer, paler, staler, and perfectly sterile
When withering clouds peel like paint from the skies
And the tapestry of chivalry begins to unravel at its core
The thousand voices of a single raindrop
Scream in apathy as they scrape down our windows of fear
Urns of Grecian flowers, broken lie before us now, pieces
Of what was, and what could have been,
Had we but tried harder to reach the golden end
But no, not gold or laurel for our human painted face
But crowns of heavy concrete sorrow from our fathers
Laced with dust and manacles of barbed wire
Building taller skyscrapers every day
To reach the castles in the sky, ever just beyond reach
The world purrs quietly, humming to the sound
Of a billion little engines droning onwards in steady motion
When will there come a stop of the quiet killing sound?
And the sorrow eyes of concrete dust and radiation
Look to the last swallow flying through the dusky sky?
Why can the insomniac eyes not simply open on their own?

The strangest poem I've written to date...

So according to my computer the last time I edited this poem was in later Feb, begining of March. This is odd, cause I have almost no memory writting it. Its one of those things that I wrote late at night when I was too tired to think or process or filter or inhibit. It is raw emotion. Raw energy. Raw craziness. Be warned, this is not meant for those with heart disorders, women who are pregnant or may become pregnant. ;)

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Crazy crazy crazy crazy bus!

Through time and space the walls collide
The barring teeth of candle light
The teapot fills with music notes
And no more clouds caught in the smoke

When thimbles rain from evergreen heights
The pencil fights the mighty key
And the paper shields the eyes of sour
Then comes the dreaded rock hour

Where is the bird and where is the comb
Why is there none and no one a home
Question marks spinning in tornadoes of flame
No periods to find or call by name

The dagger drops onto the slate
Where ever dwellers no more can find
The Light was there was gone was true
Now none can see where abide hate

Seek the lame of tongue to scourage
The blackened hearts bleed ever strong
Why can they see not roads to wrong
The surge of splurge not so absurds

Beating, breaking, bowing, blowing
Roughing, raking, ramming, rowing
Can’t find the canter ever slowing
When seething, slashing, scourging, soaring

Why?
The castle
Who?
Yes.
When?
Does it matter?
How?
Soon.

Question mark spinning in a vortex of grey
No periods to point the way.

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

Friday, April 24, 2009

My Friends

A friend to talk to ‘bout sorrows and cares
A friend to ask for advice and prayers
A friend to laugh with remembering past times
A friend to cry with over love’s deep crimes
A friend to cherish for a short season
A friend to endure against all reason
A friend to be, a light in dark places
A friend who knows all my secret spaces
A friend with troubles and lessons to teach
A friend with burdens and people to reach
A friend with a song and a gleaming smile
A friend who will come from many a mile
A friend who’ll always get me into trouble
A friend who finds treasure in my life’s rubble
A friend that makes me see life differently
A friend who mocks and humiliates me
A friend who’ll watches movies into the night
A friend who will stand by me in any fight
A friend who knows what I’m gonna say
A friend who I talk to almost every day
A friend that fades like autumn leaves
A friend that lasts like the evergreen trees
A friend with a hug just when it’s needed
A friend with a journal, only I can read it
A friend whose heart has been ever true
A friend who endured through all we went through
A friend I can talk the whole night away
A friend that forgives me anew each day
God has blessed me, its cliché but true,
To give me amazing friends like all of you

Thursday, April 23, 2009

The Harmonious Chaos of Thought

I sit and let Bach wash over me
Thoughts, phrases, words, meanings
All a cacophony inside my head
Essays, Ideas, and projects,
Data, words that I must write
Pieces of puzzles bobbing in my stream of consciousness
The currents of logic and emotions all mixing
In this steady procession of chaos
Where words and letters and puzzle pieces
Begin to fall in rhythmic line
For I am the conductor of my thoughts today
Making large emotions shrink back neath my baton
And asking reason to play a bit softer
As I cause the slow turning pieces
To all come together
In harmony
.

WoL: Part 4 - The Garden

Part 4
The Garden

Sunlight streamed in through the large windows as white linen hangings billowed out slightly in the morning wind. The light fell across the marble floor covered in thick, rich rugs, and onto the silk covered bed, and the long locks of brownish hair that spilled over it. The sunlight caused a soft golden glow about her as Lia moved on the bed, eyes snapping open instantly as she realized where she was.

She got up, took a bath, and found a small, light lavender tunic waiting for her. She slipped into the light linen and was about to leave the room when the door opened. She jumped back in time to see a small man shuffle in with a large silver tray.

“Excuse me, miss. Your breakfast is served. It took our chefs a while to decide what was best to serve a siren and honored guest such as your self.” He said as he uncovered the silver tray, revealing a seaweed porridge and several pieces of raw fish.

“Thank you.” She said picking at the fish. “You can take the seaweed back.”

“As you wish. Ah, and the Archduke also wanted to give you a tour of the city. Should I arrange something?” asked the short, fat man.

“Um, well, what’s there to see in the city?” Lia asked, looking out the window at the rows of domed roofs and banners below.

Immediately the little man began to speak as if he had memorized the lines, “In the city of Alexandria there is a well known and famous library. It is the greatest library in the world, built of red bricks, decked with viridian ivy, and domed with massive copper domes that have greened with age to a beautiful soft turquoise. Within the library are many, many rooms, each with many, many corridors, and each with many, many shelves and secret nooks. Dim golden candle light and crimson stained glass windows are the only sources of light in the dark mahogany interior, and the scent of ink and parchment saturates the air.

However, less known than the library itself are its gardens. On the south and north sides of the gardens, tall hedge mazes, perfectly manicured and precisely kept, spring up with winding passages between the bluish green juniper shrubs, bedecked in small white blossoms. The tannish white gravel paths crawl like snakes between the junipers, circling, turning, changing as they lead ever onward towards the small tucked away fountains and benches and statues. The eastern gardens are covered in small lakes and streams lined with willow and cherry trees in bloom, accented with rose bushes and large white marble statues. The western gardens are reserved for the royal family. Do any of these options please you?”

“Um, sure. Let’s go to the gardens. I feel like I’m going to be smothered by all these walls.” She answered as she followed the man out of the building

*~*~*~*~*~*

Tycus awoke outside the temple of Aphrodite. It took him a few moments to remember what had happened the previous evening before he jumped up and sprinted towards the castle. He ran through the craftsman sector and across a bridge into the merchant sector. The road he was on seemed to be going in the general direction of the castle, when it suddenly took a turn to the left. He kept walking until he came to an ornate, copper gate, rusted green with age. He slipped inside and continued on the path, hoping it would lead him to the castle.

*~*~*~*~*~*

“Your majesty, will you be dining in the dining hall or out on the veranda today?” asked a servant from behind him.

Regeus did not turn around, but instead, continued staring out the window at the bustling city. He had hoped today would be a cool day, but the rising sun was already burning hot in the sky, causing heat waves to ripple across the domes roofs.

“Neither. I have important matters to attend to. Have my breakfast sent up here.” He said turning to dismiss the servant, then walked out on his balcony. He sighed as he leaned against the white and red veined marble. His eyes glanced at the ring on his right finger. It had been many years since he wore that ring. His family’s golden seal, the emblem of a winged arrow, was raised on its blue sapphire surface.

“You don’t have to worry about her, you know.” said a voice from behind him.

“Orpheus, so you finally showed yourself. I was beginning to wonder where you where, whether or not you had gotten that promotion.” Regeus said turning.

The sea deity lounged on Regeus’s chair, sipping from his scallop shaped cup, putting his feet up on the table. “The promotion went to Triton instead. All his back scratching and yes-manning had to get some recognition. Oh well, who wants a post in Atlantis anyway. I have much more fun on the surface world. Humans are so… interesting.”

“So I take it you’re behind her new obsession with this Tycus?” Regeus said shaking his head as he took the cup of wine out of Orpheus’ hand and sipped at the wine.

“Hmph. You’re welcome.” Orpheus said, making a second cup appear in his hand. “I’m sure I have no idea what you’re talking about. Are you certain you’re not just regretting your decision?”

“Oh, believe me. I have no regrets. I am glad I made the decision I did.” Regeus said turning to face the city again. “I have responsibilities. I have certain expectations upon me. I cannot undo any mistake I make, so I must make sure not to make a mistake. Do you understand what that’s like? I suppose not. You’re a god, you don’t make mistakes.”

“Actually that’s a common misconception. We gods and goddesses usually end up making more mistakes than you humans do. We just don’t get caught, or blamed.” Orpheus said grinning.

“Well, we do.” Regeus stated flatly, pouring the wine out. It turned to seawater as it hit the marble ground.

“Well, then. If you really don’t have any regrets, prove it. Invite this Tycus to your festivities tonight. Allow the love that has taken root to flourish. Maybe this way the two of you can move on.” Orpheus said getting up. “Think about it. In the meantime, don’t worry too much about her trying to kill you. While she is your father’s honored guest, she wouldn’t dare touch a hair on your head. ”

*~*~*~*~*~*

Lia was walking through the garden, enjoying the beauty of it. The morning sun rose over the eastern gardens, the light reflecting off the lakes and streams. As the weather grew warmer and more oppressive, she moved along towards the southern maze. Lia stepped into the maze, and immediately felt a sickening feeling come over her. It was like the presence of the Archduke all over again. She looked down and saw the faint marble stones one either side of the entrance, the crest of the Archduke scratched on both.

She tested her wings, and saw that no feathers would come at her bidding. It was as she thought, in the maze she could not fly. She had suspected something like that must be why no birds were flying overhead. Lia pondered the situation, wondering if she should continue. She decided that if a human could do it, so could she.

After wandering in the maze for a few hours she heard the faint trickle of water nearby. Following the sound, she reached a small circular enclosure with a white marble bench and a large fountain. The fountain had a statue of Cupid, arrow drawn, ready to release, as if aiming at whoever walked around the corner next. And then she heard it. The sound of the lyre being strummed.

*~*~*~*~*~*

Tycus has found the path leading him up towards the castle had led him into a garden of some sort. He had walked a little bit in and realized to his horror that the garden was actually a giant maze. Now he was lost and didn’t know how to get out. As he walked he began working on his piece for that night’s performance. He sang and played as he walked.

“Tycus?” asked a voice from behind him.

He turned and saw a tall, regal man with slightly pale skin behind him. “Yes?”

The man almost grimaced before he walked up to the bard and said, “I’ve heard a lot of good things about you. I’m Duke Regeus, and these are my gardens…”

“I’m sorry, your majesty, I didn’t realize I had stumbled in here. Forgive me for trespassing” Tycus said bowing stiffly.

“That’s alright. The gods must have willed it because your music was so beautiful that I have decided to invite you to a small celebration we’re having tonight. Would you be interested in coming?” Regeus asked stiffly.

Tycus’ eyes grew wide with astonishment as he exclaimed, “Oh, yes! Thank you! Thank you! I mean… that is to say, yes I would be greatly honored to…”

“Good man. Be at the main palace by sundown. We’ll be expecting you.” Regeus interrupted him. “Now the way out is actually very simple. See those small flowers on the hedges? They only grow towards the direction out of the maze. Follow them and you’ll get out.”

Tycus took of sprinting, stopped a few yards away, then turned around, “Thank you again, Duke! You won’t regret it! I promise!”

As Regeus watched the figure disappear behind a hedge he spoke quietly to himself, “Why all the mention of regrets today, I wonder?”

*~*~*~*~*~*

Lia was still following the sound of the lyre, running faster, cursing her feathers for not answering to her call. She would have to remember in the future not to fly over the gardens. She could just picture herself falling out of the sky because of the magical barrier. But at that moment her thoughts were returning to the music which seemed to change and dance and move around her, leading her where she knew not.

*~*~*~*~*~*

As Tycus was running he still played his lyre, when he heard another one coming from close by. The music was so serene and tranquil that he lost all memory or thought of what he had been doing. He simply went to the music as sleepwalking or under a spell. He turned a corner and was in a small clearing, a pool of water gleaming in the centre. He walked towards the pool dreamily, hearing the music coming from within.

“You’re a pretty good player, for a human.” spoke a voice from within the pool.

The next moment there was a loud rushing wind and what sounded like the loudest, hardest, heaviest drop of water hitting the pool, the sound reverberating and echoing all around Tycus. The pools waters began churning, foaming, and swirling. From out of the foaming waters a large waterspout grew up to twice Tycus’ height.

The water spout was turning ever so slightly until a mask became visible, floating on its surface. The next moment the water all around the mask parted as a veil or a scallop shell opening, revealing a man inside. His skin was a seagreenish color, his hair white like the foam around him. His eyes were bright blue, glowing and piercing. In his right hand he held a mighty golden bow, in his left, an ornate goblet craved from some giant pearl.

Tycus fell on his knees shaking and spoke, “M-my lord. I bow before you. P-please, d-do not k-kill me.”

When the deity spoke his voice boomed and echoed fiercely, “Well, since you asked nicely. I guess I won’t.” Then his voice changed to that of a normal person, his hair changed from white to blond, to chesnut brown, and his skin to a deep tan, “Hahaha. You humans are so easy to scare, it’s priceless. Anyway, no, I’m not here to kill you. Actually, I liked that song you were just playing. But it needs something. Right at this point.”

The two sat and played for a few minutes, Tycus in awe of all that Orpheus was showing him, an introduction of a harmonic chord here, a speeding of the tempo there. Soon, Orpheus decided that enough time had passed and he bade Tycus farewell. The bard ran off still playing his song. Orpheus smiled a mischievous smile and picked up his own lyre, playing the same song as he walked in the opposite direction of the maze.

*~*~*~*~*~*

Lia was still following the music. A few times it had stopped and then returned and then stopped again. She had beaten the bushes furiously at those time, wishing she could extend a wing or a claw, just to destroy the shrubbery that dared to stand between her and the music. She found it again and was following it, when the next moment she was out of the maze.

Before her was a garden much different from the eastern one. There was one massive tree that rose up from the center of the garden. All around it were small trees and statues in its shade. She saw giant butterflies and moths fluttering on golden wings beneath the large tree. Lia’s ears pricked up when she heard the familiar tune.

She crept around the tree and peaked to see who was playing. The garden ran further and then dropped away into nothingness, sheer cliffs leading straight to the deep blue ocean below. The sun was setting across the waters, and a familiar figure sat upon a bench, facing the sea, strumming his worn and scratched lyre.

“Lia, is that you?” he said without turning.

She stepped out, her feathers beginning to prick up again. “Yes, Regeus. I got lost in the maze and couldn’t fly away.”

Regeus turned and smiled a forced smile, “So, you thought I was someone else?”

“No. I have no idea what you’re talking about.” She said, though her eyes flashed amber for a moment.

“Well, you can stop pretending. I invited Tycus to the celebrations tonight. You should go get ready.” He said, a rueful grin on his face at the irony of his words.

“I already told you, he’s nothing more than a friend.” She said, trying hard not to let her eyes betray her.

“Fine. Whatever you say. I honestly don’t care.” Regeus sighed as he stood up. “Do you think we could just be friends now? Or at the very least not enemies anymore?”

Lia watched him for a second, old wounds resurfacing before she walked past him towards the palace and said bluntly, “No.”

Tuesday, April 21, 2009

WoL: Part 3 - The Conversations

Waves of Love
Part 3:
The Conversations

“Lia!?” yelled Regeus before diving out of the way, narrowly missing the large golden wing, sharp feathers pockmarking the ground.

“I hate you! What are you doing here!” She screamed as she threw her large talon towards Regeus, nearly impaling him before he leapt aside once more.

“Stop!” He called, irritation visibly showing, “I don’t want to hurt you!”

“What!?! So NOW you don’t want to hurt me! Ha! Why the sudden change or heart? Nevermind! I’ll pluck it out and see for myself!” She yelled as her talon shot forth again, this time grazing Regeus’ chest, tearing the tunic and causing a small trickle of blood to stain his clothes.

“Lia! That’s enough! I warned you!” Regeus said as he jumped and rolled across the ground, grabbing the lyre he had been given that night.

“What’s the matter, can’t stand a little scratch? It’s much less than what you did to my heart!!” She leered as she raised her talon again.

“Bellum. Lux. Salve!” he called, holding up the lyre with the symbol of his family on it.

The crest began to glow a bright blue, which then spread across his whole body, covering him entirely except for his face with the blue glowing light. His eyes were also glowing bright blue as he stood his ground, waiting for her to move.

Her talon descended and he raised his arm, countering the blow in an explosion of light and color. He was still standing, as was she, her long golden wing straining against his blue glowing arm, which seemed to have extended slightly in order to stop the blow. He hopped back, flying several yards before landing softly. She was immediately upon him, and the two fought as two swordfighters in the middle of a duel, arm and wing clashing in the evening light.

“Interregnum!” called an ancient voice behind them both.

Immediately the Duke’s glow fell away, except for his eyes which were still glowing bright blue. Lia’s feathers also involuntarily retracted and she fell to her knees, her eyes still amber and bright as she glared daggers at Duke Regeus. From the shadows behind them a man stepped forward, waving his hand as if saluting, causing both to fall to their hands and knees before him.

“Archduke Magnus.” Lia gasped with fear, the amber glow leaving her eyes as they returned to their former shade of blue, her head unable to look up as his shadow fell over her.

“Lia, dear, so good to see you again, welcome to our city. This is your first time here, no? You shall be my honored guest.” Then he moved towards the Duke, who was panting heavily from his fight, prostrate before the Archduke as well. “Duke Regeus, we have a guest. You know what I expect of you. You will show her to the royal guest room in the castle. I expect you both to behave civilly.”

Regeus and Lia both gulped as they nodded. The Archduke left, and a few minutes later they felt his presence leaving as well, both collapsing in the dust, able to move once more. Regeus stood first, thought about offering her his hand to get up, then decided not to. Lia rose up with a glare and then followed him in silence as they went back to the castle. From behind them they could hear the crowd in the grove of Dionysus cheering at the last play of the night being performed.

“It’s a beautiful evening.” Regeus said as they walked, trying to start conversation.

“Don’t talk to me! Just because I won’t tear off your head doesn’t mean I’m suddenly your friend again.” Lia answered coolly.

“Fine then. Why are you here?” he asked directly as they stopped before the large hill of stairs that led up to the main castle above.

“You think I’m going to tell you so easily?” she smirked in the full moonlight. “It’s not for you, so you can stop being so conceited.”

“Trust me, I never thought you’d come here just for me. Even if it were to kill me.” He said turning and beginning the climb up the stairs.

“What’s that suppose to mean!” she said running to catch up to him.

“Never mind. So if it’s not for me, then who did you come here for? Was it for that bard, Tycus? You thought I was him when you saw my lyre, didn’t you!” he said smirking back at her.

“Perhaps. We’re might just be good friends.” She said turning towards the glade where the festivities were ending.

“Don’t worry, I won’t interfere. Thought I’m not entirely sure he’s your type.” Regeus said as he kept mounting stairs.

“What’s that suppose to mean! I mean, we’re just friends right now anyway! So it doesn’t matter if he’s my type or not!” she said her eyes beginning to burn golden again. “I’ve had enough of your prattle! I’ll be waiting at the top for you.”

And with that she took to the skies, soaring to the top of the stairs, while Regeus kept climbing the mountain of steps. When he finally reached the top she refused to talk further with him and the rest of the night no words were exchanged between the two. She went to her room and he to his. Neither slept well that night.

*~*~*~*~*~*

Tycus’ song had not enjoyed the kind of reception he had expected. He berated himself for not having taken it into consideration, that his audience were there to be entertained, not to think about the deeper meaning of love and life. He sighed as he walked through the Alexandrian streets, not paying attention to where he was going. He passed through the craftsmen sector, seeing half finished sculptures escaping from stones and unfinished mosaics that seemed to be chaos and confusion. He couldn’t help but think how his life was like those half finished, chaos filled works of art.

The next moment he turned a corner and he was before the hill that wound its way up towards the temple complex. He shuffled along the gleaming white path that climbed up past the small shrines and temples scattered across the green manicured lawns and trimmed trees and shrubs. Everything was cool and clean in the soft glow of the moonlight.

He walked all the way to the temple of Aphrodite, where the braziers were still faintly emitting the fragrance of roses as a handful of coals glowed red with their dusting of grey ashes. He walked across the mosaics of cherubs and tritons towards the building at the heart of the many rows upon rows of white pillars. He passed the yards of cerulean gossamer that let the moon and starlight in faintly until he reached the shrine.

He entered the large structure, whose massive dome had an enormous oculus at its center. The large hole allowed the moon light to fall directly down upon the gleaming statue of the goddess. Her inviting and supple form was draped with the same blue gossamer as outside, and on her head was a crown of gleaming silver myrtle leaves. Her body curved with grace, and almost seemed ready to come alive and move.

“Beautful goddess, excuse me for disturbing your slumber tonight. I was led here… oh who am I kidding. I know why I ended up here. I am in love and it’s all your fault! …. well, not actually. It’s all my fault. My own, selfish, stupid fault. I told them to sail past the isle. I was the one who wanted to hear her song. And now I’ll never hear it again.”

The statue remained unmoving as the moonlight gleamed off her slight smile as if she knew something that he didn’t know. He sat down on the floor next to the statue in the small circle of moonlight, staring at the darkness surrounding him. All of a sudden the large chamber felt small and intimate. He felt safe, as if he could tell the cold statue anything.

“You know, this is the first time I’ve ever really fallen in love. I know it sounds silly, but it’s true. Sure, I’ve had feelings for other girls before, but never as strong as this. It’s overwhelming, intoxicating, like a drug I just can’t get enough of. You know, I’ve dreamed about her almost every night since I heard her sing. I hear her songs in my sleep. Am I crazy”

He sighed into the empty room.

“I’m afraid. Afraid I’ll never see her again. And the funny thing is, I only saw her once. I feel overwhelmed. Like this is all some dream or nightmare I’m going to simply wake up from. Is love suppose to feel this way?” He paused before speaking softly, “If I’ve never been in love before, how am I suppose to know what it feels like? How do I know its really love?”

“You simply know.” said a low and sonorous voice behind him.

He turned and gasped as he saw instead of a statue there stood a beautiful woman, shining with the glow of the moonlight. Her long golden hair fell down in curls to her feet and her eyes glowed gold as well, reminding him of his Siren. Oddly, in her hand she held a scallop shell cup from which she was drinking spiced wine.

“Great Goddess of Foam Born, I apologize.” He said falling to his knees before her.

“Oh get up! Just listen. I don’t have a lot of time. I’m a very busy goddess as you well know! Now, the Siren you seek is in the royal palace as we speak. She is the honorable guest of the Archduke. Tomorrow night he will have a special celebration for her. Make sure you get in! Then you’ll be able to talk to her, but only briefly. It might be best to compose a song, with a message for her on where to meet you.”

He bowed as he said, “Thank you, O Mighty Lady who crafts love and beauty with…”

“Yes, yes. Now, leave my temple so I can get some sleep!” she said angrily.

He stood and answered, “Y-yes, O Wielder of the Arrows of Lo…”

“Go!” she yelled.

When he had run sufficiently far enough out of the temple, the goddess resumed her former pose, and turned back to stone. The goblet which was now upon her hand turned back into seawater and ran down cool marble and across the floor.

Friday, April 17, 2009

WoL: Part 2 - The City

Waves of Love
Part 2:
The City

The bright morning sun in the clear blue sky reflected off of the green domed roofs of Alexandria. The stylish white walled city, built around the ruins of ancient times, was bustling with activity in the merchant quarter as the new boats had come in. The city rose from the harbor to the illustrious royal sector, where massive white mansions, domed in gold, and with large glass windows looked out over the metropolis.

In between the pristine mansions and cluttered docks were the homes of the commoners of Alexandria. Each square, claybrick house, covered in white plaster and painted with designs, had a brightly colored banner over it, which offered shade as well as identifying the occupants as being under the protection of one of the royal houses.

A young boy was running between the shade of the banners, ducking into alley ways, a bundle held close to his arms. Behind him, several guards in gleaming silver breastplates, were searching for him. One spotted him and called to the others.

“There he is! Get the thief!”

The boy ran down an alley way, jumped over a rough wooden fence, and across a busy street, the pursuers all the while still firmly behind him. As he ran, he tripped and fell against the hard paved ground, the loaf of bread in his garment falling out.

The guard leered over him and said, “Why you little peasant! I’ll teach you…”

“Ahhh. Merculius? Correct? I remember you from the Battle of Thebes.” said a tall man with dark brown hair and pale skin.

“U-u-um, yes. Yes! Your highness, er, your grace! I am, er was, in the Battle.” the guard stammered as he was addressed by the tall man.

“And you fought valiantly and with so much honor too!” said the regal looking man with a smile. “Tell me, where are you off to in such a hurry? Pursuing some noble cause, no doubt.”

“Of course! I was, er, going to recheck my battalion’s armory, sir!” the guard said as he jumped to attention, chest swelling with pride that he had been noticed.

“Very good. You are a brave man. If you have not been commended yet, I shall see to it that you are. Carry on as you were.” The tall man said with a twinkle in his eye.

“Sir, yes, sir!” and with that he and the rest of the guards were off.

“You can come out of hiding now.” the man smiled as he turned to the dark alley where the boy had disappeared into. “Don’t worry about him, he’s not all bad. Just a little frustrated. Come on, you can have your bread back.”

“S’not mine.” the boy said as he shuffled out, head hanging in shame. “I stole it from those wagons o’er there.”

The man turned to see where he was pointing, then smiled as he said, “Here, it is your bread now. Those are my wagons, and right now you are under my banner. So, go ahead, and in the future just talk to Old Thelius. He’ll be more than happy to give you and your friends as much food as you can eat.”

“Thank you, sir!” The boy exclaimed, taking the bread, then turned to ask, “Begging your pardon sir, but who are…”

“Duke Regeus, your father has arrived.” said a herald approaching the two.

“Sorry, no time to chit chat, I have to go. Maybe we’ll meet again, ah,….?” The Duke said smiling.

“…oh, uh, Mello, sir.” the shocked boy stammered.

“Good boy. Till then, Mello.”


*~*~*~*~*~*

Among the many merchant ships at the harbor that day was one particular one, storm ravage and beaten. The sailors climbed off, shaking hands and patting backs as they told their harbor wives the tale of the horrible storm. They were on their way to make a sacrifice at the Temple of Neptune to appease his apparent wrath. The road wound from the docks, through the craftsman sector, and up the slowing hill, to where the sacred quarter of the city lay.

There were large, ornate temples to Zeus, Hera, Hestia, Hermes, and Demeter, all with large mancured lawns and decked with white, unmoving statues of gods and goddesses. However the crowning jewel of the hillside was the Temples to Neptune and Aphrodite. They stood proudly, two large rotundas of while, marble pillars, circling inward to the shrine. The floors were giant mosaics depicting scenes of Neptune’s triumph and Aphrodite’s birth, surrounded by sea monsters, tritons, oceanids, and all manner of demi gods and goddesses.

In between the tall white pillars were long yards of blue satin and gossamer cloth that swayed in the perfumed winds that would pick up the scent of rose incense in the seashell braziers around the shrines. As the group of sailors walked towards the Temple Complex they were shocked by who they saw sitting in front of it, with lyre in hand.

“Tycus! You old sea dog! What are ya doing here!?” They roared as they embraced him.

“We t’ought for sure you were a gonner!”

“Reckoned we better come sacrifice something before another of us got tekken.”

“Hahaha! So the sea gods spared your life? And what was the cost? Did ya have to marry a fish?”

“No, hohoho, lads, that’s why he’s sitting out here. Can’t you tell he’s gonna be a slave priest to the sea gods in exchange for his life! He’ll never sing another fair voyage prayer again!”

“Well, you saw what happened the last time he sung one! I wouldn’t let him even if he weren’t a priest-slave.”

“It is good to see you all again.” Tycus replied as he finally separated himself from the embraces and pats on the back. “Actually, I was not at the shrine of Lord Neptune, but at that of the Lady Aphrodite.”

“Hoho! See, I told ye he had to marry a fish!”

“Shut yer gab an’ let the lad speak!”

“Well, I was rescued by another merchant man after the storm. We sailed for a while and then… then I fell in love.” Here a dreamy glazed look came over his face. “We sailed past the Siren of the Rock.”

“What!”

“That’s impossible!”

“No, we did. But I was the only one who listened. And her song was so beautiful, so captivating, that even now it lingers in my mind and plays over and over again in my heart. And now the Lady Aphrodite, fair and noble foam-born, she has heard my prayers and brought you all back to me. So that we can sail back and I can be with my Siren, Sealia.”

“You’re out of your mind, lad.”

“That siren’s bewitched he, mark my words. This aint love, its just a spell.”

“What’s the difference?” Tycus asked dreamily, “What’s the difference between blind cupid’s arrow and hers? What is love, if not some spell that opens man’s eyes and makes him understand?”

“More like makes him blind and mad!”

“Come then, let us go and seek the wisdom from the Lord Neptune’s priest. They can divine whether we should leave or not.”

“Lets pray the Lord Neptune doesn’t still want our heads….”

“Aye, and that’s its really him and not some demi-god joke.”

*~*~*~*~*~*

“Lia, Lia, Lia. How do you expect to find him? You have no idea how big Alexandria is! Or any idea of the intricate workings of the city. Even if you spent months circling it you might never see him.” Orpheus called as to the Siren overhead.

She looked down at him, lounging in his large scallop shell chariot, a team of thundering hyppocamps pulling him across the waves, keeping pace with her soaring in the wind. He had a good point, but she had to find this man. Tycus. The one who had seemed unaffected by her song, or at least, able to contain his affection. Why hadn’t the song worked? Why was he able to simply smile and sail on? Why was she thinking so much about him? Was it love.

“Yes and no! Now slow down! The city insn’t going anywhere. And neither is he.” called Orpheus after her.

She quickly suamersualted in the air and dove straight down, landing impeccably on the very tip of the chariot rim, leaning forward as she spoke, “What do you mean? You know where he is! Don’t you! You’re keeping him there, and telling me not to go because you know that will just make me go faster!”

“Gee, it took you this long to figure it out? I was beginning to worry.” He smiled, “Alright, fine. I know where he is. He’s lounging in front of the Temple to Neptune, feeling sorry for himself because Neptune’s Oracle told him not to leave the city. Are you happy!”

“Neptune’s oracle? I didn’t know Neptune had an oracle.” She smiled. “Thank you Orpheus!”

As she launched back into the sky, Orpheus yawned, pulling a goblet from the sea and sipped at the contents. The chariot and the hippocamps all submerged into the water, leaving him sitting on thin air, pondering his cup as he spoke to the oceans nothingness, “Ahhhh. Love is so droll. Oh well, at least its somewhat entertaining to watch. I have a feeling tonight may be intresting….”

*~*~*~*~*~*

That night the festival of lights was in full swing over the city of Alexandria. The people lined the streets wearing brightly colored mask of red, yellow, and orange, all bearing a torch or a candle where they went. The guards also carried candles, but each was armed with a bucket of water as well, eyes peeled for any sign of fire getting out of control.

In the midst of the carnival festivities, the youth from the royal houses also donned masks and costumes and grabbed their lit torches to run through the streets with the rest of the city. It was a wild and freeing night that came but once a year, and none were willing to miss the showdown later between the two great playwrights, Artistophal and Terricius, who were both premeering their new works later on.

Caught up in the middle of this was the young Duke Regeus. Although he was almost 23 he was still called ‘young’ by everyone because his father was still rulling. Eventually that would all change. Then he’d have responsibilities and life would become all business. However, that was to come, and this night was the night of celebration and freedom.

He had gone with his friend Egeus, and had met up with Brutus and his three sisters and their friends, who made the make to female ratio somewhat one-sided. All night long Regeus found himself holding a fibula or a shawl, or helping some frail maiden to continue on the celebration path to the amphitheater in the glade of Dionysus.

They were all seated, candles held firm, as the audience waited. The lights at the ends around the amphitheater were put out, the single line of candles at the front all that remained. Music began playing as mist rolled on the stage, and several characters dressed in white rolled and cartwheeled across the stage, large grotesque masks portraying singular emotions. These were the gods.

High above the very last seat in the ampitheater, unseen to all, floated Orpheus, goblet in hand as always, watching the proceedings and laughing merrily at the protrayl of Neptune, with long shaggy goats hair beard.

“A good impression! Bravo!” went his unhearible calls.

The play proceeded, a comedy after the ancient form, with dances, senex, and witty slave, all going round and round in confusion and hilarity, ending finally in an octople wedding. The ampitheater shook with applause and cheering at the spectacular show. Terricius came forward, smiling broadly, bowing and smiling smugly at his opponent, Artistophal.

Between the two plays, there was an intermission, where one of Alexandria’s new bards would sing his song of unrequited love and hopeless anger with the god’s decisions. The crowd applauded slightly, but most were not impressed. Half way through his performance, Regeus was pulled away by one of his companions.

“Come on! I have a surprise for you!” she giggled as she led him up the path away from all the lights to the overlooking cliff next to the Temple of Neptune.

“Here, it’s a gift!” She handed him a package. “Open it!”

He unwrapped the package to find a lyre inside. It was fine polished wood, engraved with his name, and set with his family’s seal. She leaned forward, breathing heavily behind her mask.

“I had your family’s magical seal placed on it, with the hope that this may soon be our family seal.”

In that moment Regeus was knocked over by a gust of wind and a shrill scream coming from below the cliff. He pointed towards the temple, and his companion ran there, while he leaned over the cliff to see if someone had fallen. As he stood over the cliff, the large golden wings flapped into view. The Siren rose on long, sharp wings, her mouth wide as a harrowing high pitch note increased in octives over and over again, nearly glass shatter.

“No! Tycus! Tell me it isn’t true! Tell me you don’t love… that thing!” she said sobbing as her feathers retracted and she stepped forward, a woman once more, and lifted his mask.

“Lia?” Regeus asked with shock as he hair fell from her face.

“Regeus?!” She backed off with a look of mixed surprise and anger as the mask fell away, “You?! … You!!!”

In a split second Lia had transformed into her golden winged form again, claws raised and ready to strike, all her anger burning in her hot amber eyes. She let out an ear piercing call, and saw the object of all her hatred before her. Regeus had no where to run.

Waves of Love: Part 1 - The Meeting

Waves of Love
Part 1:
The Meeting

“Can love be tamed? Can love be bought? Can love be framed? Can love be sought? Can love be built? Can love be torn? Can love be made? Can love be sworn? Can love be true? Can love be false? How do we know? When love is love at all?”

“Hey Tycus! If you keep that up you’ll have us all turning this boat around to go check on our wives!” yelled the burly sailor manning the ropes of the small ship.

“Pardons. I wasn’t aware that you had feelings such as this. Don’t you have port-girl waiting for you?” asked the small man with the curly dark hair.

“Hahahah!” the sailor roared, slapping him on the back and sending him flying, “We don’t worry about those cheating on us! It’s the Mrs. we worry about! Right lads?”

There were hooting and cheering as they crew bounded about, making remarks and fixing rigging as they steered the small ship across the blue Mediterranean. Tycus stuck out like a soar thumb, his soft hands, delicate fingers, and whole clothes set him apart. He was no sailor, he was a bard. He carried his lyre with him where ever he went.

“Well, I have to finish this piece by the time we reach Alexandria.” He spoke as he looked at the waters flowing beside the boat. “I must recite for the royal family.”

“We know. We know. We’re just pulling your leg, boy. Get back to your verses and sing the sea gods a song to get us there faster.” He roared with more laughter as the sailors when about their work.

“Hmm. Now, let’s see, where was I? Oh, yes. When is love, really love…”

*~*~*~*~*~*

The storm raged and beat against the small craft, nearly tipping it over as massive waves crashed against the sides. Lightning crackled and snapped at the skies, and struck the mast, lighting the whole scene. The crew was all running about, securing their supplies and their products for the market. Tycus had grabbed a rope and tied himself firmly to the mainsail. Then it happened.

One moment the boat was fine, the next everything went quiet as water flooded over them, like millions of fingers gripping and pulling at Tycus’ hair, clothes, and skin. Then fear crept down his heart and into his stomach as he felt the tight rope go slack, the waters pulling him with them.

He was touching rough wood and then nothing as he somersaulted in the water. At that moment he was at the mercy of the seas. He knew immediately that his chances were slim. Being thrown into chaos and turmoil like this, he would probably not survive. But somehow, he did. The current stopped turning him and he rose towards the surface. He would make it.

*~*~*~*~*~*

Tycus was rescued by another merchant ship. They immediately recognized him when he was brought on board. He was treated with awe and respect, being spared by the sea gods and given a second chance at life. On that ship, he was like a sea god to them all.

They sailed for a few more days, Tycus becoming more familiar with the crew and the captain, all still treating him with the same fear and respect. He still felt lost and lonely after loosing all his companions but he decided to move forward. That was when it happened.

“Good morning captain.”

“Good morning, sir.”

“Why are we changing course? We’re suppose to be going due south from here, yet we’re travling west. Why?” Tycus asked curiosly.

“Well, because of… her.” The captain whispered.

“Who?”

“Sealia, the Siren of the Rocks.” The captain gulped fearfully. “She lures men to her and then when they get there, they are beaten to death on the rocks of her shores. She sings a song that no man can resist. We dare not sail close there.” The shaking captain replied.

“I would like to go past there if we could.” The bard said. “She may be able to help me with this song.”

“Please! Sir! No, we can’t!” the captain said fearfully.

*~*~*~*~*~*

On a gleaming, smooth, white stone in the middle of the ocean she sat. Her long hair had shades of brown and gold interwoven in it, her ocean blue eyes looked across the deeps and she sighed. Her pale blue gown, with silver interwoven, floated lazily in the breeze. She turned as she heard a splash behind her.

“What are you doing here, Orpheus?” she asked smiling.

“Lia, aren’t I allowed to say hello?” smiled the figure that had leapt from the waters behind her.

“Well, not while your face is still a shark.” She said shaking her head of curls.

“Oh, right.” Said Orpheus, who wiped at his face as if it had water on it, wiping the shark away, revealing an unnaturally handsome man with a glow in his eyes “Is that better? You know, as a mere Siren you should not be speaking to a god like that.”

“Demi-god, remember! You’re not Poseidon yet!” she smirked and sang a high note, causing two chair-like rocks to surface from the waters. “Have a seat.”

He simply walked across the water as if on dry land, she spread her arms, long golden feathers coming from them, and flew to her own seat. Once she landed the feathers seemed to retract into her slender arms.

“So why have you come Orpheus?” she asked the demigod with a raised brow.

“Well, I happen to know that a ship is coming this way today. I wanted to see you at your best.” He smiled mischievously, “That is if you still have it.”

“Oh please!” she just said, now scanning the horizon carefully, “What kind?”

“Carthigian. Merchant man.” The demigod said, waving his hand over the waters, making a table of pearl with dishes and goblets arise from the sea. “Care for some wine? Its spiced.”

“No, thank you. Where is this ship?” all her attention was focused on the job at hand. Her golden feathers were beginning to prick up from her skin all over, even in her hair, as she watched the horizon.

“Well, suit yourself.” Orpheus said as he took a sip from the silver goblet. “Hmmm. Wonderful stuff. Ahh, there we are, your ship my dear Lia!”

True to his words, a ship could be seen far on the horizon. Lia’s eyes were now completely golden as she gazed at the far off ship with hatred. She raised her arms, flapped her wings, and with a mighty leap, was in the air. Her entire body was covered in golden feathers, in the shape of a golden swallow with her wings stretching far and only her face visible anymore. She circled the small islet, the wind through her feathers beginning to make a buzzing sound.

“Oh, dear. Better put away the breakables. This is going to be messy.” Orpheus said dryly, motioning for the table to recede into the water. “Well, if you keep flying in circles they’ll sail away before you got one note out!”

The sun flashed off her golden feathers and then her song burst forth. Orpheus had to steady himself against the stone chair, his hand grasping at his heart. He had taught her well, her song had gone straight for the heart. He took a deep breath and then looked up with a smile. She would rub him about that later.

The ship changed course towards the isle, and she landed on the white stone. The wings receded again and once more she was simply a maiden with golden brown hair and a pale blue dress, standing motionless on the stone. Orpheus cocked his head sideways as he watched her, arms at her side, hands fisted, head bent, and eyes closed.

The ship had gotten much closer, the men were hanging overboard, their hot, sweaty, bodies gleaming with desire as they nearly foamed at the mouth. Then her eyes snapped open, her arms raised forwards, her fingers clawed. She uttered several harsh tonals, clenching and unclenching her fists.

“Um, Lia…” Orpheus was looking out to the sea.

The waters churned beneath the boat as a swarm of sharks came to her calls, knowing that their feast was about to begin. She brought her hands together, as if praying, then trusted them up with a high pitched scream, as a large white pillar of stone trusted up from the deeps, smashing the vessel and throwing all onboard to the sharks.

“Lia, there’s another ship coming.” Orpheus said, turning away from the bloody massacre in the waters. “That is the Carthigian. This one, well, I’m not sure where this one came from.”

“What does it matter!” she snapped, looking to the other ship. “They will all die like the dogs they are!”

*~*~*~*~*~*

“There is her rock, sir.” The captain said, none too pleased.

“Perfect! Now, what we’ll do is I will be tied to the mast, the rest of you, stuff your ears with wool. We’ll sail right past the rock, and no matter what I say, don’t take the wool out until we reach the rock!” Tycus said as they neared the rock.

“But sir, how will we know if it will work?” asked the captain, looking fearfully towards the speck of gold that seemed to circle the island. “You saw what she just did to that other ship!”

“Don’t worry. The gods spoke to me in a dream. There will be no death for us today.”

*~*~*~*~*~*

“Well, are you going to smash them yet?” asked Orpheus who stood next to Lia.

“No, why bother raising a second pillar? I’ll just have them ram into that one.” Lia said casually, “The sharks are already there, already ready for them.”

“Ahh, yes, good point, waste not, want not and all that.” Orpheus said with a yawn.

She began singing and waited with a smug grin on her face for the ship to deviate. But the ships just kept going smoothly. There was no commotion on board, no rushing to get to her rock. The men were not behaving like pigs, as they normally did. Who were these men that she had no affect on?

*~*~*~*~*~*

As ship passed rock, the sailors all refused eye contact with the Siren. Only the young bard, tied to the mast, straining at his ropes, looked her in the eyes. He smiled, for his speech has left him completely, her spell upon him. The demigod sat, a look of amusement on his face.

“Well, you can still skewer them if you hurry.” He said, taking a grape from him returned table and plopping it in his mouth.

“Who were they?” Lia asked, with wonder.

“Ah, well that was no one in particular. You mean the young musician that was looking at you? His name is Tycus, He’s a bard from Carthage, and a good one too I hear.” Orpheus said as he threw the rest of the grapes over his shoulder.

“Do you know where they’re going?” she asked determined.

“Alexandria. Why?” he was suspicious, “You’re not possibly planning to…”

“I’m going after him. I think, I’m in love.” She said smiling as she spread her wings and flew of the rock after the speck on the horizon.

“Goodbye, Lia.” said Orpheus as he lowered all the stones back into the sea, “Or should I say, see you soon.”

Wednesday, April 15, 2009

TO ALL MY READERS, HELP!!!!

Dear Readers,
Thank you for your continuous patronage of my blog. You don't know it but you are what keeps me writing when all other lights go out. However, now you have an oppertunity to aid me more than you have ever aided me before. And all you have to do is deliver your own, frank, personal, honest, forthright opinion.

In exactly 41 hrs and 58 mins at the writing of this post, to submit a piece of fiction (short story), a piece of nonfiction (real life profile), and a poem or set of three poems, to the PSU Susan Mae Kallog Writing Honors Awards. If I win, it may be published, I may get award money, or just a pat on the back, depending on what I win for. However, before I get ahead of myself, I need to know what to submit. And that's where you, dear reader, come in.

I have no idea what to choose. Nonfiction will be easiest, as there are only two pieces I have on the blog that are considered nonfiction: "The Tea Set", and "Of Soup and Bread", both very recent posts. However, the other two catagories require more dilegence. I feel I need the help of an outsider. PLEASE, HELP ME.

Choose the three stories, and or poems, you consider the best. Also, if you could explain what appeals in them to you, that would be great, but not required.

Thank you so much. Once again, you, my readers, will have helped me one more step of the way towards my future.

Sincerely,
Jean

Tuesday, April 14, 2009

The Foolish Nobleman

Once there was a noble man
Who rode a noble horse
And horse and man travled far
Upon a dangerous course

They rode far off to distant lands
Crusaders where they true
But did they ever reach those sands?
Did they do what they set out to do?

For a treacherous road they did take
As could be rightly seen
On one side dropped the world away
In a steep ravine

The other side was worser still
For there lirked vexation
In the wheeling mists were figures
Offering every temptation

The noble man had taken this path
Arogantly thinking he was fine
He thought he could whether all things
And reach the end in time

So when he set out he galloped fast
The steed did carry him well
But before he had gone too far
Into the mists he fell

For there he though he had seen
A mountain of rich gold
And wanting to take some with
To keep when he was old

But no mountain did he find
Though he sought day and night
Then in the mists he almost died
So he galloped off in fright

He went a while further then
Resolute to keep his way
However he soon persued again
In less than a day

For the man was noble and weak too
And thought he aspied a girl
One whose beauty and grace
Was worth risking the world

But when he reached her, woe to him,
A tree in the fog it was only
So he sought his way back again
Miserable and lonely

The horse was still waiting there
For the foolish noble man
And so they continued on again
To follow the first plan

On and on the noble man went
His progress ever slow
For he would not go too far
Before into the mists he would go

And more than once had he almost
Ran over the ravine
For in the mists were malicious things
And calling things unseen

And now you may very well ask
Whether this man did reach
The place he set out to find
And a lesson there to teach

But I cannot tell you where
The man is this day
For we must each and everyone
Help him find his way.

Monday, April 13, 2009

Ode to Sleeping

Ode to Sleeping

Oh how my gaze falls lovingly upon you,
Ere the hours of long night draws neigh
The golden moon watches through shadow trees
And the stars are veiled in their slumber

O how I would to be as those stars
To lay my head upon your soft pillow
To wrap my self in your blanket so warm
And close my eyes in sweet peace

I see you there, in the corner
Calling, inviting me to your warm arms
My soul faints at your temptation
And I cannot resist for much longer

O to fall upon your wondrous springs
Your soft, warmth lulling me to dreamless sleep
Claimed by rest only you can bring
O how I long to come to you my bed!

Green Grey

So for people who have more than one eye color they can combine the poems that include their colors, kinda something like this:

Green-Grey

Green are the lights that dance in the north
Grey is the light of the pale moon
Green is the world when the new life comes forth
Grey is the sky when dawn comes soon

Green are your eyes, alive with energy
Grey are your eyes, mysteries they keep
Brimming with laughter, hope, and vitality.
Sparkling with magic when others sleep


I guess could just write a few lines of verse for all of them, but I’m too lazy. It would end up still being a synthesis, something like this:

Greenish Grey

Greenish grey is the ocean’s mighty waves
Greenish grey are the dew decked grass blades
Greenish grey, your eyes keep mysteries of life
Magic laughter, serene and without strife

Brown

Brown
dedicated to everyone with brown eyes

Brown is the earth, life’s progenitor and home
Brown is the world’s foundation pillars of stone
Brown is the soil, so fertile and warm
Brown is the rough bark, of the tree’s hidden form

Brown is the eagle’s mighty feathered wing
Brown is the mane of the lion ever hunting
Brown is the turtle’s shell in its wandering
Brown is the leviathans of the ancient sundering

Brown is chocolate, so smooth and sweet
Brown is coffee, simmering with heat
Brown is the road that ever onward leads
Brown is our home, no matter our deeds

Brown is the mustard seed, smallest of small
Brown is the mightiest mountain so tall
Brown is your eyes, giving unto all
Nurturing, raising, answering the call

Amber

Amber
dedicated to everyone with Amber eyes

Amber is the coat of the playful-friendly fox
Amber is the happy, worker bee in its box
Amber is the monarch’s great dancing wings
Amber is the red-capped robin as he sings

Amber is the resin of the ever faithful trees
Amber is the color of the changing of the leaves
Amber is the honey that drips from the comb
Amber is the caramel with its memories of home

Amber is the sand of the far and distant shore
Amber is the spice there, that mankind so adores
Amber is the space, veiled in warm candlelight
Amber is the clouds there, when kissed by dawn’s sight

Amber is the sun-fire which life and warmth makes
Amber is the rose kept for dear friendship’s sake
Amber is your eyes, radiating so much love
Shining warmth, acceptance, and cheer from above

Sunday, April 12, 2009

Green

Green,
dedicated to everyone with green eyes

Green is the vine that wraps round the tree
Green is the air beneath the canopy
Green is the plains of running grassland
Green is the moss upon ruins of man

Green is the distant parrot that mocks
Green is the serpent found in the rocks
Green is the gnome and lithe faerie
Green is young Puck, dancing merrily

Green is the crown set with emperor’s jade
Green is the emerald for empress made
Green is the fruit when not yet done
Green are the boughs when spring has come

Green are the lights that dance in the north
Green is the world when the new life comes forth
Green are your eyes, alive with energy
Brimming with laughter, hope, and vitality.

Saturday, April 11, 2009

Grey

Grey,
dedicated to everyone with grey eyes

Grey is the mist on the mountain’s peak
Grey is the fog, blanketing ocean’s sleep
Grey is the pale skin of dusk’s light
Grey is the world when comes the night

Grey is the wolf, noble even the least
Grey is the owl, the wisest of beats
Grey is the willow’s saddening leaves
Grey is the web the spider now weaves

Grey is the dust from which came man
Grey is his castles, walls, and dams
Grey is his iron of pen and sword
Grey is his shade, when he is no more

Grey is the light of the pale moon
Grey is the sky when dawn comes soon
Grey are your eyes, mysteries they keep
Sparkling with magic when others sleep

Friday, April 10, 2009

Blue

Blue,
dedicated to everyone with blue eyes

Blue is the light in the early morn hour
Blue is the sun’s heavenly bower
Blue is the sky with cotton ball clouds
Blue is the mantle, the stars enshrouds

Blue is the clear waters of the sea
Blue are the rivers running eternally
Blue is the sweet springs and lakes
Blue is the frozen glacial wakes

Blue is the bird and mighty whale
Blue is the robin’s egg so frail
Blue is butterfly’s paperthin wings
Blue is the berry, of all things

Blue is the color of your eyes
Blue is the windows so full of surprise
Blue is constant no matter smile or frown
I look in your blues and almost drown.

The Tea Set

Just a short little something I wrote for my writing class:

The Tea Set

How do I begin to describe my Oumie to you? First, I should probably say that Oumie is a term of endearment, used by the Boer people of South Africa to refer to one’s great-grandmother. Although I’m nineteen, my Oumie is not even 90 yet. Obviously my family believes in marrying young and having children ASAP. When my parents and grandparents and great-grandparents married they were all less than twenty years old, and according to them I’m running out of time.

But enough about me. This is about her. My Oumie. The best way to describer her to you is to give you a snapshot. A day in the life. Or more accurately, a few hours that I spent with her on my last visit to South Africa. Nothing paints a clearer picture of who she is.

It began, as all days do, with the sun rising. But this was one of those days, those African days, where the sun scorches the air, burns the grass golden, and cracks the red African ground into powder. The powder get into the air and you can almost feel it coating the inside of your mouth and throat as you breathe. But it has a pleasant, sweet taste that lingers on your tongue, and even now, I can taste its memory. To say it’s like a drug would not be too far off.

On a day like this, we drove from the region close to the Cape, leaving the rainforest and banana plantations behind, and crossed the large expanse of the golden plains of central South Africa. It’s almost savannah but not quite, there are just enough trees for it not to be. The land is flat, stretching out far and wide until it disintegrates in the heat waves dancing at the edges of the world. At the end of our long road was the city of Welkom.

Welkom is an odd city. We drove for miles and miles of flat, uneventful plains of sun-yellowed grass when suddenly we enter an entire area that is lush and green. Well, as lush and green as you get when you’re not at the coastline. The entire city has no stop signs or red lights. Instead, some brilliant civic engineer has left his mark by making every intersection, big or small, a roundabout. This makes for extremely fluid, though sickening, driving. Luckily we reached the house in less than five minutes.

The house is not her house of course. It belongs to Oom Willem. Here I should probably also add a side-note that “Oom” means Uncle in Afrikaans, the language of the Boer people, and that normally all older, males that are close to the family are referred to as Oom whether or not they are actually your uncle. Oom Willem is my great-uncle, one of my Oumie’s six children. Since people in my family get married so early on obviously they will end up with a large brood.

Anyway, Oom Willem is Oumie’s current caretaker. I say caretaker because she happens to be living on his property and he feels that it’s his responsibility to take care of her. However, she is not some sickly old lady that needs taking care of. If anything, she would be taking care of him if it weren’t for his wife. But more on that later.

We got to the large house, enclosed in its high brick walls, lined with electric fencing and all. South Africa has the highest crime rate in the world and not having an electric fence, alarm, and watch dog is considered moronic. Behind the walls was a very neat house that smelled like lemon, mahogany, and musk, and was always cold, no matter what the weather.

I was escorted to the back of the house where a stone courtyard spread out towards a small cottage. The courtyard was partly roofed and partly shaded by large palm and fig trees. There was a large barrel for collecting rainwater, to use for the small spaces of greenery that had been delved between the courtyard and the high walls. At the side was a dove cage that resembled a wardrobe made of chicken wire.

The white door with the peeling paint opened and Oumie stepped out. She wore one of her handmade outfits, a dark color just between blue and purple, with small white pearl buttons. Her completely white hair fell in waves down to her ears, and she looked practically regal with the white and purple contrast.

Her face was wrinkled, bones projecting from her cheeks. Her fingers were all shriveled and thin, but still warm with life and activity. Her entire frame was small, compact, and yet she did not seem frail at all. In fact, if we were both knocked over right then, I would not be surprised if she ended helping me up. Its not that she is that lithe or springy, she just has that look of preparedness and activity in her eyes.

When she walked, she half shuffled and half glided, as if she were on ice. She smiled a smile that is slightly crooked, revealing mischief and tenderness all at once. I ran to her and gave her a hug, surprised how light she had gotten. I knew she lost weight but this was concerning. As I put her down she answered me before I could say anything.

“You’re looking good, my child! So handsome and fine! But so thin! I’ll make you some of my vetkoek (South African deep fried pastry eaten with savory ground beef) later. But first let’s have some tea. Then you can tell me all about America.”

We sat out on the stone courtyard by the small metalwork table. Its top was covered in a fine grained mahogany, and set with a perfectly white lace tablecloth. Some of the things she had been allowed to keep after my Oupie (great-grandfather) died. The maid, whom she calls Tandi, comes out with the tea and biscuits.

Tandi has been a part of the family for almost five years now. The previous maid, Sara, had been with them for twelve years before she got married. The one before that, Mary, had been with my Oumie for almost 40 years. Tandi already knew how Oumie liked her tea and biscuits served when there are guests, and continually refer to Oumie as “Tanie” or aunt, and me as “klein baas” or little master.

She left after bringing the tea out and Oumie began pouring the tea. The tea set is extremely old, hand painted pink roses weave around the white porcelain cups and saucers, while golden vines and accents surround them. The rims are also golden, as if the maker thought our lips would be too good to drink from mere porcelain.

“So, tell me Oumie, are you happy here?” I ask as Oumie adds cream and sugar to my cup and stirs it before handing it to me.

“Oh, yes, very happy. Your Oom Willem as been so generous to me.” She said as she made her own cup of tea, took a thoughtful sip before saying with her eyes sparkling, “They still think I don’t know, do they?”

“Know what?” I asked, taking a sip from the tea too to give myself time to think of an answer.

“Hehehe. They think I don’t know they want to put me in a home for the elderly.” She said as she gently offered me the biscuits, “You know I’ve been to those places before. Several times, in and out. Every time your Oom’s wife convinces him that I have to go. Then once I’m gone, he feels so bad that he takes me out again. It’s all rather funny.”

“But you would rather stay here?” I ask, nibbling on a biscuit absentmindedly.

“What I want, is not to be a burden. Frankly, it seems that whether I’m here or there I’m still a burden so both ways, I’m not happy. But enough of me, why did you come visit me?” she asked as she dipped her biscuit in the warm tea.

“Oh, no reason.” I lied, “Just to spend time with you.”

“Thank you.” She could tell I was lying, “You’re so considerate, just like your Oupie. And you look like him too. Sure, you have your father’s eyes, but the rest are all Oupie. And you’re just as stubborn as him, if you’re mother is to be believed.”

“I can’t help it. Its in my blood.” I said relieved that the focus was off of my reason for visiting.

“It’s true. He was so stubborn that he even refused to take his heart medication. He said that if God wanted him to live then the medicine wouldn’t make a difference.” Here her smile returned, “So I would grind his medicine up, and mix it into his tea every night. In fact, that was his cup you’re drinking out of right now.”

“Really, wow.” Kinda creapy, but cool, I thought.

“Yes.” She smiled a slightly nostalgic smile as she continues, “That tea set has also cause a lot of commotion through the years.”

“What do you mean?” I asked.

“Well, back before you were born, during the years of segregation I would insist that Mary, and later Sara, use the same tea cups as me when we had tea in the afternoons. You know all those other ladies from the church nearly had a heart attack when they learned that I wasn’t forcing Mary and Sara to drink from the tin cups. You wouldn’t have believed all the calls I got about my ‘unhygienic’ practice.” And here she laughed. “After that I had trouble getting any of them to come over for tea again.”

“That’s incredible! You mean this tea set helped play a part in bringing down apartheid?” I had always wondered about my family’s role during that time in our nation’s history.

“That was one of our people’s greatest sins. Not a day goes by that I don’t find myself asking forgiveness for our people’s sake, from those we wronged and from God.” She said before the twinkle returned to her eye. “But now they’re trying to kill us, so I guess in the end, all humans are just cruel, not just us.”

“Why don’t you come live with us in America?” I asked. “It’s safer there. You can actually walk down the street without fear of being mugged. There’s barely any crime compared to here, and you can actually sleep soundly at night. There’s none of the fear.”

“Thank you, my child. But you forget how old I really am. As much as my heart would go with you on this new… adventure, my body refuses.” She said with another sip from her cup.

“Now you’re the one not telling me something.” I said smiling.

“It’s nothing. Like I said, I really don’t want to be a burden. Whether physically or emotionally. So, lets just keep drinking tea, and we’ll pretend you’re just here because you wanted to drink tea with me, and that I’m just staying here in South Africa because I like the weather better.” She smiled that same smile, and for once, I see the slight bitterness to it, the bitter sweetness of her soul.

So I didn’t ask her all my questions about our family history I had come to ask. I suddenly realized just how painful it must be to delve into the past for her. She smiles all the while, but all she has left of her life is the memories. She would answer my questions too, if I asked. Like she said, she doesn’t want to be burdensome, and now suddenly I feel that the feeling was and is mutual.

That afternoon, when our tea was done, I helped her make one of our traditional Boer dinners. She showed me techniques that she had passed on to her daughters, and granddaughters, and that she had feared would be lost, as none of the great-granddaughters showed interest at all in cooking. Luckily for her, she has one great-grandson who was willing to learn.

Then she asked me to show her some of the things I had learned in America. I made a tiramisu, and she continually walked from her pot of savory curry beef to come see what I was doing, making mental notes. We both laughed when my grandmother and mother came in and reprimanded us both for stirring the food with teaspoons and knives instead of with ladles. Neither one of us did it consciously. Some things must just be in a person’s blood.

When we left, and drove on that long, straight road across the golden plains, I could feel that same bittersweet smile on my own lips. I now understood what it meant to say goodbye and know that it was very easily for the last time. I had learned so much, but most of all, I had learned that I did not have nearly enough time. Enough time to spend with the ones I loves, enough time to do what I wanted, enough time to change the world.

Driving on that straight and narrow road across the African plains, with the billowing blue and green clouds above me, I had an eye opening moment. Life is short. Time runs fast. People leave too soon, and tea cups are too fragile. In that moment, as the rain fell on the parched, red dust and turned it to mud, my eyes were opened. And I wept. I wept for the time I had wasted. And I wept because the light was too bright.